Only Child Life

Being an only child is strange sometimes. It always has been. Do people with siblings have imaginary friends as children? Do people with siblings like the attention of being picked on by an older sibling? Are people with siblings as close to their parents like I am with mine?

It took me all my life to pity my parents for the number of times they had to (and still have to) listen to me yell “LOOK AT ME!” Only to do some minuscule shit. On the flip side, having three teenage stepsons that like to annoy each other at every chance possible has made me thankful that I grew up in a fairly quiet household – except when my best friend was over, then I am pretty sure my parents were thanking their lucky stars that I wasn’t a twin or there wasn’t an “oops!” after me.

Growing up as an only child wasn’t necessarily a problem, it was just different. My parents are older so they didn’t have a lot of friends that had children my age – and my mom owned a bar for a bit so I grew up around a lot of adults. My parents didn’t talk to me like a child, their friends didn’t talk to me like a child either. Don’t get me wrong, I am the first person to do some childish tomfoolery (pinatas, silly string, fart spray, you name it) but I also matured mentally ahead of the curve. On top of that I became pretty good at darts, pool, and claw grab machines – but don’t get me wrong, I can still throw a pretty mean temper tantrum that are on a level that only children that are only children can throw. Try me.

My closest friends might as well be my sisters. They’ve been there through thick and thin without enduring any family drama or choosing family sides. As I have gotten older, I have even acquired some friends who are also only children – one of which who procreated with another only child and their daughter is an only child so far. So, that’s kind of like the Godzilla of only children in the making, right? If so, I hope she remembers me coloring with her at her birthday party and spares my life.

I’ve only scraped the surface of only child life. I’m sure there will be a sequel.

Don’t let the cute face fool you in this sweet Woolworth’s photo. I was apparently a force to be reckoned with when you stepped foot into a Winn Dixie with me.